Whether you contact me through your funeral Director or directly, I will be in touch normally within 24 hours. I will introduce myself, check in on you and ask if we can arrange a time and a place to meet. We will talk about who else might be able to join us such as family members, friends or neighbours. Often the meeting will take place in your home, but we can arrange to meet at the Funeral Director’s premises or even a coffee shop, if you prefer.
Our meeting
When we meet, we’ll chat about the family and important people to the person who has died. We will talk about how your loved one spent their time, including any hobbies and interests, the jobs they held, the football team they supported, the music they listened to. You may wish to share stories, memories or information about key occasions which will help the service reflect the unique characteristics of the person you are remembering.
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We’ll talk about the structure of the service. You may want friends, family members, colleagues or associates to say a poem or reading, or to share anecdotes and stories. Other times families prefer to leave the speaking to the celebrant. Either is fine.
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If wanted, I can help you select poems, readings, songs, and music. If you would like hymns or prayers to be included, that is also possible. There is no right or wrong. It is entirely up to you and how you feel is the most fitting way to say goodbye. I've added some popular poems, hymns and music choices here which may help you decide.
The next 48 hours....
Within 48 hours of meeting you, I will e-mail you the first draft of the funeral eulogy. You will have an opportunity to review it and make as many amendments as you see fit. I will make changes in light of your comments and we will continue to exchange drafts of the eulogy until you feel it best reflects your loved one and what you want to say about them.
I will liaise with any people who will be speaking on the day and check they are happy with their role in the service.
I will ensure the Funeral Director is aware of music, poem choices and that these, along with the agreed running order for the service, are reflected accurately in the Order of Service, should you decide to have one.
On the day......
I will arrive at the venue twenty minutes before the service is due to begin.
I will deliver the service and co-ordinate any music, readings or tributes.
After the service, I will present you with a keepsake copy of the eulogy.
Thoughts to take away
​​The Dash by Linda Ellis
I read of a man who stood to speak
At the funeral of a friend
He referred to the dates on the tombstone
From the beginning…to the end
He noted that first came the date of birth
And spoke the following date with tears,
But he said what mattered most of all
Was the dash between those years
For that dash represents all the time
That they spent alive on earth.
And now only those who loved them
Know what that little line is worth
For it matters not, how much we own,
The cars…the house…the cash.
What matters is how we live and love
And how we spend our dash.
So, think about this long and hard.
Are there things you’d like to change?
For you never know how much time is left
That can still be rearranged.
If we could just slow down enough
To consider what’s true and real
And always try to understand
The way other people feel.
And be less quick to anger
And show appreciation more
And love the people in our lives
Like we’ve never loved before.
If we treat each other with respect
And more often wear a smile,
Remembering this special dash
Might only last a little while
So, when your eulogy is being read
With your life’s actions to rehash…
Would you be proud of the things they say
About how you spent YOUR dash?